3 Ways To Make A Snow Day

For over a decade, Snow Day Calculator has been providing accurate forecasts to millions of students each winter with our patented Snow Day Formula. This secret formula was constructed using regressive statistics, advanced mathematical equations, algorithms to scrape each school district of it’s snow day history, but with also, less commonly known, a snow day mojo meter (also known as the mystical “hype” factor) incorporated into the system which attempts to feel out the desire of the Snow Spirits and the faithfulness of their believers.

The rituals, traditions, and sacrifices made to these Snow Spirits in order to increase the likelihood of a big snow storm have mostly been forgotten or lost to the ages. It was not until a chance discovery, reading through some old history books in Massachusetts, did the creator of the Snow Day Calculator discover ancient Gods worshipped by Native Americans to influence the weather or increase precipitation. Although it was not first taken seriously upon discovery, the decision was made to incorporate and account for some of the things that these ancient Snow Spirits preferred. It couldn’t hurt, right…?

Things did not go as planned. Inconsistencies were noticed over the years, such as snow storms that came from nowhere, or otherwise faded away in minutes, that could not be explained by science. However, the snow day mojo system, which attempted to account for the Snow Spirits, were able to predict with a fair amount of consistency when such freak weather changes could occur. Often, when the odds of a snow day seemed almost a foregone conclusion, and resident math teachers would predict an 100% chance of a school snow day, the mojo meter would show signs completely against all predictions indicating the Snow Spirits were not pleased. Wisely, the Snow Day Calculator would only list the chance of a snow day at 95% instead, and sure enough, the massive snow storm that was supposed to hit suddenly fell apart into a weak gale with barely a few snowflakes.

Perplexed by such outcomes, the experts began to investigate what could cause such events to occur? They poured through ancient tomes, searching for answers as to what sorts of things Native Americans did hundreds of years ago to please the Snow Spirits. Additionally, the author of SDC would ask their users what sorts of rituals they performed, or habits they had, when such Snow Day anomalies occurred. For the first time, Snow Day Calculator is proud to present an unfinished list of things that have been shown to please the Snow Spirits, and increase the chances of snow based on over a decade of research.

1. Using Snow Clothes

Researchers have found that, hundreds of years ago, natives would wear special outfits to influence the weather. Perhaps they needed relief from an unrelenting series of snow storms, or wanted more rain for a bountiful harvest? No one knows for sure what kind of clothes they wore, or how it was used, resulting in tremendous speculation. Here are some of the things SDC users have reported back, with varied success:

  • Wearing pajamas or jackets inside out and backwards.
  • Jewelry made out of ice or even small ice sculptures on jewelry. Some have said just a necklace made out of ice cubes worn outside the day before was enough, others report success with elaborate designs.
  • Keeping gloves, hats, or mittens, outside. A way to tempt the Gods into showing their power? Or to show faith and desire? It is not clear here.
  • Others have reported that wearing gloves, hats, or mittens while asleep have done the trick for them as well. One user said they even wore their snow pants one night!
  • Wearing your boots indoors the night before.
  • Keeping jackets hanging above a pile of ice.
  • Unlacing their boots, freezing the laces, and then re-lacing them in the opposite boot.
  • Wearing gloves on their feet, or boots on their hands, and walking outside.
  • Eating dinner with hats, gloves, and boots on, or sitting on hats during dinner.
  • Putting hats on snowmen.
  • Putting hats, gloves, or boots on their dog, or some combination of the 3, and walking them outside.
  • Wearing hair braids with ice, or creating snowflake paper cutouts to be worn as earrings or as a hair tie.

2. Snow Day Rituals

While the natives wore special outfits, they would also perform elaborate rituals. While no one knows exactly what they did, many have tested out various rituals themselves and reported back to the SDC with stories of victory:

  • Putting a cold spoon under one’s pillow.
  • Flushing ice cubes down the toilet.
  • Brushing one’s teeth with their non-dominant hand, with cold water of course.
  • Yelling “Snow Day!” into the freezer (before bedtime!).
  • Afterwards, enjoying ice cream out of said freezer. Some users claims that the more ice cream they eat, the greater the chance of a snow day, but SDC is not liable for your caloric intake. Please ritual responsibly.
  • Placing a white crayon on every windowsill the night before. It can be tricky to find enough white crayons, so here you go.
  • Letting your feet soak in ice cold water.
  • Giving your pets ice cubes.
  • Laying out snow gear in preparation for the snow of tomorrow, at the foot of  one’s bed.
  • Taking a cold shower.
  • Eating dinner with your non-dominant hand.
  • Fasting the night before, only drinking cold water.
  • Various religious practices combined with ice or winter gear, such as a cross made out of ice, a star of David made of white crayons, or a prayer rug lined with hats, gloves, or mittens, are some of the examples reported. But who knows what else could work?
  • Refreshing the Snow Day Calculator as often as possible to try and influence the results.

3. Snow Dances

Finally, after performing the rituals and wearing special clothing, Native Americans would then perform special snow dances, which are still done to this day! The knowledge of these dances, however, is kept in extreme secrecy. At most, legends survive of snow dance successes. For example, reports of successful snow dances can still be found:

In January 2012, members of the Southern Ute Indian tribe met at Vail Village, in Vail, Colorado, with the hopes of bringing more snow to the nearby mountain. While the members of the tribe began their snow dance ritual, hundreds of people gathered to observe. It was reported that, as the ritual progressed, the snowfall increased. According to the Vail Mountain Marketing Director, the Southern Ute Indian Tribe had also performed a snow dance when the mountain originally opened during 1962. The success of the first snow dance ritual resulted in the second call on the tribe years later.

Similarly, in 2014, a snow dance ritual was performed at the Sugar Pine State Park in Lake Tahoe by the Eagle Wings Native American dancers. According to the executive director of the Sierra State Parks Foundation, snow began to fall, unexpectedly, only a brief period after the ritual dance was performed.

Yet, clicking on the sources we find the links are dead or removed, most likely in order to protect the secrets of pleasing the Snow Spirits from undeserving or malicious hands. Thus, we are forced to rely on trial and error, with lots of speculation, based on our snow day mojo calculator and reported user behavior…

Virtually all reported snow dances involve a group of people. Some claim the larger, the better, but all those involved in the dance should be making some kind of ritual offering or dressed appropriately for the occasion.

It seems that there are many ways to please the Snow Spirits, or perhaps just a few? Without more testing and feedback, it is difficult to know. The snow day mojo meter often reads a bit higher out of the areas that users have tried the above suggestions, so that’s how Snow Day Calculator knows there is something about these rituals and customs which influence the Snow Spirits. What works best, or is most reliable, is still very much up for debate. The uncertainty regarding these methods is very high, but naturally that does not stop the people from trying. So, if and when you do try out some of this snow day magic, please report it back to the Snow Day Calculator so additional data can be collected and passed onto future generations. Remember to always check the Snow Day Calculator prediction to see if you had any success influencing the snow day mojo after doing anything above!